Crafting With Little Ones {Re-Post}

This is one of my all-time favorite posts and it was written well before I had many readers. I'd like to share it with you again because I think that the message is important if you want to foster a love of creativity in your children from a young age: It's not the outcome that matters; the process is most important.

Don't Throw Out The Baby with the Bathwater!

When I was a kid, my brother, sister, and I had "bath night". One night a week. It was usually on Wednesday because that's when The Dukes of Hazzard was on TV. My dad (he raised us) would fill the tub, set my little brother up with a snack in front of the TV - where he'd be glued until the last "YEE-HAW! - and my sister and I would go first. By the time he wrangled us into the tub, scrubbed us, and managed to wash and rinse both of our heads of hair (Against our "EEEK! Don't get it in my eyes!!!" protests), the TV show would be over. He didn't drain the water and re-fill the tub for my brother. He'd just add a little hot water to warm it up and it would be his turn yell about soap in his eyes. I was able to watch my sister while my brother, who absolutely hated baths, screamed like a banshee the entire time he was in the tub. No wonder we only got one bath a week!

I've been thinking about this lately because my kids have always had 2 - 3 baths a week until recently - my oldest MUST take a shower daily and Little Guy has been cut back to once a week. I think the new schedule for my oldest is pretty much self-explanatory to anyone who has had a teen boy in their home for more than a week! As for Little Guy, there were a couple of reasons for my changing things up.

First, we're cutting down on our water usage and baths take a lot of water. Next, he really doesn't get that dirty. I mean, he is covered by clothes most of the time, it's cold out so he's not sweating like crazy, and the dirtiest parts of him get washed many times a day - hands and face. In the summertime, he tends to get dirtier, but with his regular rinse-offs in the wading pool and sprinkler, a quick towel-off at the end of the day usually does the trick. If he happens to get extra-dirty one day, he can take a quick shower with me.

Finally, it's just easier. In my experience, many children have some fear of baths when they are around 18 months to 2 years old. Little Guy passed this stage with absolutely no problems. In fact, he used to smell his armpits and declare, "Ooo! I'm stinky and dirty! I sure need a bath." in hopes that we'd fill the tub. Sometimes he'd do this multiple times a day. But, recently, he's become afraid. I blame my husband for both of his fears: 1) The monster who lives in the drain, and 2) Getting shampoo in his eyes. Yep. He did it - he told Little Guy that there is a monster in the drain. He only had to say it out loud one time, during a very trying bath time where Little Guy kept jamming his entire hand down the drain. He was so afraid that his hand would get stuck and had tried everything else. It was one of those stupid things you say as a last resort and regret it even as the words are coming out of your mouth. I cannot get Little Guy to believe that Daddy was joking - he's scared!

Before the fears set in...

As for the shampoo... Little Guy used to love having water poured over his head. This made washing his hair the funnest part of giving him a bath. Then, one day, my husband couldn't find Little Guy's shampoo and decided to use the cold-process soap (yeah, the stuff that's made with lye) on his hair. The soap got into his eyes and burned and burned. Now, getting his hair washed is a nightmare. He kicks and screams and splashes. I had to go back to using tear-free shampoos because he squirms around so much that it's impossible to keep his eyes shampoo-free. Our city's use of chlorine in the water isn't helping matters - the water stings my eyes when I shower! His hair gets washed only when it loses its curl and starts looking dirty - I cannot see why I should wrestle him down once a week to clean mostly-clean hair.

So, due to Little Guy's bath strike and my oldest's need to take more showers, I've just been thinking a lot about bathing. Especially bathing throughout history. I remember reading that, in the western US, when pioneers were just beginning to settle, people took very few baths. Water was pretty scarce in most places. Ma would fill up a half-barrel with hot water and the entire family would wash in it every couple of weeks - sometimes just once a month! You know that saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater"? That comes from this little tidbit: Families would bathe in order from oldest to youngest, leaving the baby last. By the time the infant made it into the tub of luke-warm water, it'd be filthy. (I just cannot get that out of my head! I imagine that this is probably a big reason for so many disease-related infant deaths.) So that saying really hold much more meaning when you think of bathwater that is so dirty you wouldn't notice the baby in there!

I guess I'm done with my pointless rambling. The subject's just been on my mind.

How often do you bathe your children? Do you think it's too much, just right, or not enough?

Teaching Children Critical Thinking Skills

"Look at our cool new toy! All the kids love it. See how much fun they're having? YOU could be having this much fun, too, if only you had this toy! Check out this kid... He was playing all by himself until he got this toy. Now, he's got a ton of friends who brought their cool toys over so they could all play together - and they're having a pool party, too! Just beg your parents for the toy and they'll get it for you... if they love you! Only $19.95. Get it NOW!!!"

That's how it starts. When we're young. Commercials have power. Did you ever beg for the toy in the commercial, only to have someone actually buy it for you? If you got the toy, was it nearly as cool as it was made out to be? Did it do all of the cool things the commercial promised? Did it break five minutes after you got it out of the package?

Advertising is amazing, isn't it? I remember when I started to realize that everything I saw or heard on TV wasn't exactly true. It made me feel smart that advertisers couldn't use the power of words and pictures to make me believe everything they said. I learned to read the fine print at the bottom of the screen. I figured out that the statistics that get flashed in front of me may have come from studies of 10 people. Like, "9 out of 10 physicians we asked prefer our brand!"

But, I didn't get the full jist of critical thinking until I took a college course on it. I learned about red herrings and hyperbole. I learned how it's not only advertisers who use this stuff. You need critical thinking skills for everything - politicians, drug companies, and the government are great at getting people to believe them. We're supposed to trust them, right? Why would they lie to us?

I have thought that schools should be required to offer critical thinking classes to all high school students. The more I think about it, though, the more I realize that we cannot trust such a big job to them. They are part of the government! I believe that, if schools were to include critical thinking skill in their curricula, they would do a great job of teaching children to be wary of advertisements. Period. The government relies heavily on our trust in it, so why would it go out of its way to teach entire generations to question authorities of any kind? It could be disastrous to politics.

***Now, before we go any farther: The examples I am going to be using are MY personal beliefs. It doesn't really matter what I believe or what you believe. These are examples. It's the lesson that are important, not the personal political and health topics of the examples. So, if you don't agree with my point-of-view, that's cool. That's not what I'm writing about... OK? Still with me? Good.***

1) Do Your Own Research

Remember a couple of years ago, when governmental health departments were threatening us with possible death from the flu if we didn't go out and get an immunization against it? There was a huge advertising campaign that probably cost billions of dollars that tried every angle known to man to get every man, woman, and child immunized against this killer. I remember one letter I received in the mail from our county health department, after we all should have received our shots. It was pretty creepy and gave me a "BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU!" kind of feeling. The letter stated that they knew my children had not been immunized with the flu vaccine and gave me a date and time of when a health department social worker would be at my home to talk with me about why I chose not to give the shot. Or, I could have the kids immunized, get a doctor's note, and mail it to them within two weeks. I was scared to death that they might have the power to take my kids into custody just because I didn't agree to have them immunized. Once the fear ebbed, I came to my senses and did some research, asked questions, and finally called them and told them a visit wasn't necessary. (Thank you, NVIC!) My state allows parents to refuse vaccines based on their philosophical standpoint. The letter was their way of scaring parents into getting the shot. I didn't know it at the time, but my friend received the same letter. She had her kids to the doctor the next day - she was sure her kids were headed to foster homes if she didn't do what she was told.

Now, I'm not writing about anyone's personal decision of whether to immunize or not - I just wanted to show you an example of how the government can cause panic by not giving you all of the facts. Nowhere did my letter tell me my rights. I now know that I could have thrown the thing out, let the worker show up at my door, and refuse him or her entry. There's nothing they could have done.

2) Question Authority

As parents, we need to step up and teach our children to question authority. They have a right to ask questions. Even the basic laws we have, in our homes or in our government, should be questioned. Laws are basically a way to keep peace in society. (Yes, I know. Nowadays, laws are more than that, but let's go into that another time.) There are laws about how to act when you drive a car. These are laws that keep us safe: Stop at red lights, drive at or below the speed limit, the car on the right has the right-of-way. A child might question one of these laws: Well, why do we have to stop just because the light turned red? If we didn't stop at red lights, people would go whenever they want and two cars going in different directions could crash. You can also teach kids that laws are a kind of set of rules for manners: You stop at red lights to give drivers going in the opposite direction a turn. I don't want my children to act like blindfolded sheep, just following along with the herd. The more questions they get answers to, the more they learn.

I know that I was safe from being charged with any kind of neglect for not having my kids immunized because I didn't just believe what they told me. I looked for my own answers. It's great to answer any questions that young children have, but it's even better to show them how to find the answers on their own! When my oldest was still being homeschooled, I used to carry a pen and a pad of paper with me. Whenever he had an authority-questioning inquiry, I wrote it down. This was back before the days of using the Internet to find all of your answers, so we visited the library once a week. I showed him how to look for books using the card catalog (yes, before computerized library systems, too!) Many times, we found ourselves in the law section of the library. But we also visited biology, physics, sociology, and reference. He learned how to find answers to his questions.

At the beginning of the school year this year, he came home pretty upset. One of his instructors was teaching the class that our Congress-persons were in Washington D.C. as representatives of the people who elected them. These representatives made decisions based on the needs of those people. My son's says he shook his head (now, my thinking is he probably made a snide comment to a classmate...) The teacher asked him to stand up and say what his problem with the lesson was. Now, he thought this was really cool - high school is a meeting of the minds! He told the teacher his basic understanding was that big companies usually told the representative what to think. (Now, whatever your opinion on this subject is is fine with me. This is my belief and I have explained my belief to my son who then adopted it as his own. For the purposes of the story, the table could have been turned and the teacher was telling the students about lobbyists and my son was on the other end of the argument. It really doesn't matter to the outcome.) The teacher asked him to gather his things leave the classroom. No explanation. Didn't send him to the office. Nothing. He stood in the hallway until class was over. He was confused, afraid, and angry. He had questioned authority and even gave his reason for questioning and was tossed out of class for it. He didn't think he'd done anything wrong and neither did I.

Now, I'll leave the rest of the story for another time because it really has nothing to do with my post. What it does show is that, when we begin to question authority, we're bound to run into those who are afraid of our questions. We need to prepare our children for this - something I neglected to to for my son. I'm remedying the situation right now. He needs to know that questions are OK to ask, whether the response is appropriate or not is another thing entirely. When he questioned the teacher's lesson, she didn't know how to cope with the challenge, so she reacted inappropriately. He now knows that he has the right to ask - no one can take that from him just because he's a kid! An improper response is just that - improper. He's not responsible for that part of it. And, if he should end up in trouble for asking a question, I'll stand behind him. Incidentally, I've also taught him the difference between questioning authority for a legitimate reason and doing it just to make trouble.

3) See For Yourself

Back to that cool toy. I think the only way to convince kids that commercials are not telling them the whole truth is to show them. Buy your kid the "must have it" toy once in a while, if you can afford it. Here's how I did it with my oldest (still working on this with Little Guy.) He saw the commercial and just had to have it. And the darn commercial was on every single time we turned on the TV. The toy was in every ad insert in our Sunday newspaper. He saw it in the stores when we went out. He constantly begged for it. I got sick of hearing about it, so I decided that I'd try something other than ignoring the pleas. Whenever the commercial came on, I'd sit with him and watch it. I'd ask him questions: Do you really think that thing can fly that high? Does it really walk all on it's own? Wow - I wonder if that kid's friends are playing with him because they like him or the toy more. Do you think that mom would love her kid any less if she didn't buy that for him? Do you know that I have go away to work for three hours just to make enough money to buy that one toy? On and on. I asked one, maybe two, questions each time the stupid commercial came on. We talked about the answers. He still wanted the toy. So, I bought it for him for his birthday. He was so excited... then heartbroken. It was not nearly how he thought it would be. It broke the next day while he was trying to make it do something he saw it doing in the commercial. We talked about it. I asked all the questions again, this time he had the answers down. He knew.

The one experience didn't teach him to be wary of commercials. Soon there was another must-have toy and we went through the same things. I think we had about a year, between the ages of four and five, where the cycle repeated about four times. After that, he started asking himself the questions. To this day, there are still times when he comes across something he really wants. But, usually, it's because he's done his research and still wants it. And, usually, the thing ends up being true-to-life. He doesn't get caught up in all of the promises that ads make. In fact, I'd have to say that he's onto them even faster than me! Now, when a commercial comes on TV and we're watching together, we play a game of pointing out all of the crazy claims that they make. He loves being smarter than the advertising pros!



Do you have any advice on how to teach children critical thinking? Please share them. I think that Little Guy is going to be harder than my oldest was to teach these skills...

MY Post About Having a Three-Year-Old

Now, I keep reading posts by moms of three-year-olds that say their kids have suddenly morphed from sweet little toddlers into bratty little princes & princesses who are moody and demanding. Yep. I have to concur with these moms - Little Guy is the same. I've really been questioning whether I'm raising a brat or just a strong-willed and independent little boy. The kid seems to create his own tantrum situations.

"I not listen to YOU!"

 Yesterday, he woke up and demanded cake for breakfast. Now, first of all, I'm not giving him cake first thing in the morning and he knows it. Sugary goodness turns him into a bitter devil. Second, we didn't even have cake - haven't had any since October, in fact. I pointed out that we don't have cake (because the "no, you have to eat something healthy" was just asking for a tantrum), in hopes that he'd see how his request would be impossible to fulfill. Tantrum ensued anyway. And his tantrums are no longer just a toddler kicking and screaming for a few minutes before he's ready for a hug. Uh-uh. Now, they entail long periods of crying about unfairness and how I don't like him anymore. They also have toy-throwing, wall-punching, and all kinds of other lovely behavior. I end up putting him onto the bed and blocking his way off because I just won't put up with that shit. Sometimes he'll go on for an HOUR about something like I got him milk to drink rather than the juice that he telepathically told me he changed his mind about while I was pouring the milk he requested.

I don't know what to do anymore. I have read and read on how others deal with this kind of behavior (Aha! Parenting has some great articles) , but the ideas just repeatedly backfire. He's a smart little one and, while a new approach will work the first time, he sees through it the second time. I'm finally getting him to say his feelings ("I'm very, very ANGRY!!!") so I can mimic them back to show him I understand. But it's not helping - instead of yelling and screaming about the problem, he just yells and screams about his emotions.

My husband isn't helping, either. Due to some physical and mental problems, he's not spending enough time with Little Guy to even be able to understand his speech. When he is around, he gives in to the demands just to avoid the tantrums. This means that Little Guy is "the boss of Daddy" and he sure throws his weight around! When my husband just cannot give in, such as a situation like the cake one or something that is dangerous, he goes from weak-willed Daddy to the guy who's threatening to spank. Especially when Little Guy is hitting (yeah - THAT makes sense!) Then Dad leaves because "I can't deal with this anymore." UGH!

The only thing I can think of doing differently is spending more one-on-one time with him. I thought that we already did a lot of it. But, now that I stand back and evaluate our time together, we don't. We might be in the same room, but we are both doing different things. He'll be playing with his cars while I hit up Facebook for the latest news. Not really quality time.

I have a ton of projects that I want to do with him (check out my Pinterest Kids' Crafts and Recipes boards!) but I really need to get my house in order first. So, I've been working on getting our house cleaned out and organized. I've been asking him to help me, which he eagerly agrees to do. Unfortunately, he will help for only a few minutes - then he's into things he knows he should not be playing with, running into the bathroom and tossing anything he can get his hands on into the toilet, or running into my oldest's room and messing with his stuff (our doors don't close correctly, thanks to shoddy carpentry.) After five or ten minutes of cleaning, we end up throwing in the towel for a little while. It just feels like an uphill battle right now and I'm becoming disheartened and frustrated. I'm going to keep up with this, though, because I'm pretty sure that the novelty of it will wear off and he'll (eventually) be able to focus on our "Important Jobs" that I need his expert help to complete.

This kid is busy. He's smart and can see through plans and, I swear, tries to foil them just for the heck of it. He really wants to be helpful and spend quality time together - it's just that he's still at that self-centered age and wants the best for himself first. And, thanks to Daddy, he thinks that flipping out and throwing a huge tantrum is the way to get those things. I suspect that he leans toward the ADD side due to his inability to do anything for more than a few minutes - even the things he LOVES to do. He's got a great sense of self and takes pride in anything he does - especially when he doesn't need help to do it.

Does anyone have any suggestions for me? I don't do rewards for a good job - I want him to learn to do good things because he will feel good inside, not so he can get a sticker or piece of candy. He is often congratulated when he obviously struggles with something and overcomes it, whether it is getting his pants on by himself or helping me do the dishes without getting down off the chair and running around the kitchen getting into everything. He knows the rules that are unchanging (mainly safety ones) and the rules that can be bent (the "harmony ones" that help us all live together.)  

Two-Ingredient Thin Mint Cookies {Last-Minute Homemade Gifts}

O... M... G...
These cookies are AMAZING!!! And, yes, there are only two ingredients. You can literally make a few dozen of these in less than 15 minutes and people will be raving about them! I wouldn't venture so far as to say that these are just like the ones that you can buy in March from little girls dressed in green and brown, but they are close enough (and WAY more affordable!) The flavor is there, but the texture is more delicate.

Now, I don't have a photo of them because, as it turns out, my husband and oldest found my stash and pigged out. No worries, though, you can see a photo HERE, on Vanessa of The Crafty Nest's Pinterest board, where I found this idea. I cannot find her original post on her blog, so I cannot link you directly.

So, here's what you're going to need:

• A bag of Andes Mints (the original ones)
• A box of Ritz crackers

That's it.

Now, you can find Andes Mint pieces in some stores. They cost a little more, but you don't have to unwrap a zillion of the mints and they melt faster since they're already broken into small bits. I bought one bag of each kind because I couldn't resist having some of the mint foils on hand for projects. (Hey, free green foil paper! I'm thinking St. Patrick's Day and springtime craft projects!) Also, I didn't try using an inexpensive store-brand cracker. I wanted these to taste just right and wasn't willing to risk it. I'm sure a cheaper box of crackers would work out just fine, though.

Here's what you do:

Over a double-boiler, melt the mints. I made sure to get them good and warm so the excess chocolate would run off easily. Just be careful that you don't over-do it and burn the chocolate - ick! You could probably use the microwave, but I don't care to melt large amounts of chocolate that way. It heats from the inside out and can sometimes get overheated and burn without even changing shape!

Make sure you pull out any broken and flaking crackers from the package (I crumble mine up and keep them in a jar for a quick topping for mac and cheese or other casseroles). Simply drop one cracker at a time into the melted mints, flip it over, then fish it out with a fork. With the coated cracker laying bottom side down, very gently tap the fork to let the excess chocolate drip off. Set the coated cracker on a baking sheet lined with waxed paper or parchment (I use parchment this time of year - less chance of sticking and you can reuse it many times for the same thing.)

You can leave the cookies as they are, or make them look pretty. Since I have my assistant chef helping me all of the time, it was decided that our cookies would be pretty. I gave him several small bowls with different cookie toppings in them: nonpareils, sprinkles (some of you call them jimmies?!), colored sugar, candy cane pieces, etc. As soon as I set a freshly-dipped cracker onto the baking sheet, his job was to decorate it with "just one little pinch" of whichever topping he chose, and sometimes a few of them!

When I finished with a tray, I put it into the refrigerator for about 5 minutes to let the chocolate set up. After I let them return to room temperature, I put 3 to 4 of the cookies, depending on how big Little Guy's pinches were, into a cupcake liner. We put three cupcake liners worth of cookies into a sandwich bag and tied it securely for giving to friends and family. You want to make sure that these are sealed pretty well or the minty flavor will sink into your other baked goods - not very yummy!

Now, I have to go melt some more mints. There are two guys in the doghouse right now who are going to be replacing the cookies they ate last night. See? These are so easy to make that I can actually have them do it on their own!

We're in This Together (Mindful Parenting Collaboration}

Mindful Parenting Collaboration - Topic 4: Partners in Parenting

If you’re reading this, you might have the feeling that you want to change some of your parenting practices or, perhaps, you're curious about “mindful parenting” and what it could be. Well, congratulations for taking a moment from your day to click on the link. Erin of it’s OK and I are going to be working together over the next 40 weeks (!) on a journey toward more mindful parenting and would love to have you join us. To learn how we envision The Mindful Parenting Collaboration working, please read the introductory post HERE.

I know I keep saying this, but this topic is a really tough one for me to write about.Way back in June, I wrote THIS POST about some of the problems I was encountering at the time. The fifth one is about some problems between my husband and myself. They've gotten better and then worse, back and forth, since then. Our relationship is a mess right now and it's not going to be an easy fix. Most people, if I were to give them the entire story, would have told me to get the hell out a long time ago. But, in my opinion, this is one of the problems with society today: If it's broke, throw it away and get a new one. Well, I won't throw out a broken vacuum cleaner without trying every possible way I can think of to fix it and I'm not going to do that with my marriage.

However, this "broken" relationship makes parenting as partners really tough. Over the past year or so, I've slowly taken over all aspects of the role of "parent". My husband has become the teenage roommate who happens to share our space. He is a fun companion for the kids... when he feels like spending some time with them. He doesn't regularly enforce rules, he allows Little Guy to manipulate him into giving him whatever he wants. This will go on for 10 minutes to an hour until my hubby just boils over and starts yelling and threatening to spank. Not cool with me at all. Especially after he's gotten the kid all wired up and made him think that he rules all. It literally goes from "Super Crazy Fun Time" to "I've Had it!!!" in seconds. There are lots more things I could while about on the subject, but I think you might get the idea.

I don't yell at my husband. I wait until they're asleep before I attempt to confront any situations from earlier that day that I think need discussing. The spanking issue is a hot button around here. He never spanked his older kids. It's one of the things that attracted me to the guy. But now, rather than actually working at figuring out why the behavior from Little Guy is defiant, he would rather just jump to threatening to hit him. His reason for thinking spanking this child is because, "... he's just like I was as a kid and I know how to handle a kid like that." Um... yeah. So spanking kept you from starting your "career" as a drug addict at 11 years old? Spanking kept you from burning down a neighbor's house 'just because' at 13? Spanking kept you from running away from home at 15? I can go on, but you get the picture here, too, right? Anyway, that's the biggest issue we have in the parenting arena.

There are others. I really would like him to be more consistent with the time he spends with the kids. One day, he'll hang out with the family all day long. Then, there might be an entire week where he's so wrapped up in himself that he won't even bother to look at the kids. I know some of this has to do with pain. I can be understanding when he hurts so badly that he just can't concentrate on the kids. But, I really think that most of it has to do with him not feeling like it.

So, I talk to him when the kids aren't awake. I explain my reasons for how I would like the kids raised. I listen to what he has to say. Our conversations don't (usually) get out of hand and to the bitching, nagging, or yelling stage. By the time we're done, he will usually agree that he needs to work more on being consistent, not giving in to puppy dog eyes and tantrums, being around on a regular basis, etc. We'll make a plan of action so he can ease into this more easily and so the kids can get used to the changes, too. It'll work for a week or so, then it becomes too much work and he goes back to the old way of "parenting".

This past week, I followed Erin's advice of what to work on in my relationship. I'm going to have to do this more often because I'm just not sure how it's going to work out over a long period of time. The first thing she asked that we do for the topic "Partners in Parenting" was figure out what your relationship needs most and work on that one thing. The next step was to take a day and put my partner first for the entire day. They both kind of backfired on me. I think that the change in me might have confused hubby some, so I'll keep this up and see if it doesn't get better.

I think that our relationship, as a married couple and not parents, is honesty. I don't lie to my husband, but I will withhold information if it makes me "right" and him "wrong". That's a deception, too. So, I flat out told him what I was up to. I explained that I think we both need to be 100% honest about our feelings, actions, thoughts... everything. Yes, it might sting a little to hear certain things from one another, but it's important to share them rather than bottle them up. And, we're in this together: this marriage, this parenting thing, this LIFE. We have to be able to trust one another above anyone else in the world! I told him that, rather than trying to find the lie in everything he says (I swear, he lies and doesn't even have a reason except to "see if I can get away with it"), I'm going to trust that he's being honest. I do it with my kids, why not him? Well, he's been lying like crazy about all kinds of stupid things since. I think he, just like a child, is testing to see if I'll fall back into second-guessing everything he says. To see if I'll still love him even if he lies. So, it's not been all that great. I hate being lied to - it makes me feel as if I am not valuable as a person to the one who's lying. I really hope his little testing phase will be over soon...

As for the putting your partner first for the entire day... Ha! He's suspicious. Asking if he'd like me to make him a snack rather than just leaving him to do it kind of freaked him out a little. Seeing that he was having computer problems, I offered to help. I usually let him deal on his own - that man can download 1,00 viruses in five minutes flat - because it always, always, always takes hours to fix his mistakes... and he always claims he wasn't doing anything but reading his Facebook news feed. I offered to help, then didn't get frustrated with him for screwing it up so badly, as I usually do. I asked him if he wanted a back rub when he complained about it hurting. Once he got used to the idea that I was trying to be nice and think of his needs, he started to take advantage... just like a child would. He was asking me to hand him the phone that was ringing and sitting 1 foot away from him. He asked me to do all kinds of silly little things that he didn't need help with just to see if I'd do them. It was really annoying and, when I was busy with Little Guy, I had to tell him to do it himself. But I did try to put him before myself. I can't do this everyday, but I will revisit this again, whenever I can. My theory is that he'll eventually stop taking advantage. Then, maybe he'll even reciprocate. That's how a marriage should be, right?

So, while there really is not conclusion to this topic for me right now, I will continue working at it. I think that, once we can get our relationship with each other going in the right direction, we can work on the parenting aspect. For now, I can accept being the parent. Oh, and my kids will never hear me bad-mouthing my husband. They will, however, hear and see me trying my best to treat him with respect. It's important, not only to them, but to our entire family.

Looking For a Fun & Educational Book for the Kids? {@CowsCantJump}

I've always been interested in how children learn. With my oldest, I was amazed to find he could suddenly do things that he didn't know how to do the day before. He taught himself to read seemingly overnight just after he turned four. Well, really he didn't - I just wasn't paying close enough attention to notice all of the little signs of reading that he had been showing. With Little Guy, I've been much more keen on every little thing he learns. Witnessing his speech go from babbles and coos to actual words was amazing! And I loved finding out that, although he didn't have the physical ability to say certain words, he knew what they meant when I said them to him. One particular thing I noticed in his speech and vocabulary development was that nouns came first. I "tested" my theory that this is the same for most toddlers while watching and listening to them talking to each other at the library. Their speech was mostly made up of nouns, with a few verbs and adverbs thrown in (usually due to a phrase that they often used, such as "Go bye-bye.")

Now that he's speaking very well, using full sentences and a wide array of words to express himself, I wanted to introduce him to new words. Since I believe heavily in unschooling, I didn't want to sit down and "teach" him these words. I wanted him to learn them in a way that was natural and fun. Boy, did I jump for joy when I received an offer to review two children's books that contain a ton of new words. Cows Can't Jump and Cows Can't Quack, written by Dave Reisman and illustrated by Jason A. Maas, are the perfect fit!


Cows Can't Jump starts with, "Cows can't jump... but they can swim." It goes through many different animals, starting with what the animal can't do, then showing what it can. The book moves from familiar verbs, such as swing, to those that children don't often hear very often, such as wallow. Cows Can't Quack is similar, except it uses animal sounds. I loved showing little guy what each of these new words meant. We wallowed in the blankets on the bed. We grunted loudly. We laughed quite a bit!

After asking me to read the two books about a zillion times withing a couple of hours of receiving them, Little Guy decided to read them to me. Then to his stuffed animals. And, when my oldest came home, he just had to read the books to him! Later that evening, as he was playing with his cars, I listened in on Little Guy's narration (he is always talking!) His BMW was "pouncing" on the Cadillac. The tow truck was talking to the bus with a series of clicks, just like dolphins. I was watching my little one practice his new words!

Another thing I observed him doing was building up his cars' self-esteem. (Yeah, I know it sounds weird!) But, at one point, he was using a piece of cardboard with a block under it as a ramp. One car would speed down, but the other one kept crashing half-way down. After a few times, my empathetic kid picked up the crashing car and said, "You can't race fast, but you can so stunts!" I'll be willing to bet that he made that car feel much better! He's also used this way of dealing with shortcomings on the cat and even me. And, just last night, after he tried to keep up with my oldest while playing a football video game that he kept losing, he was feeling pretty low. My oldest, being the big brother, kept saying things like, "Ha, ha! I win!" to him. (Yeah, I thought that sibling rivalries would be non-existent with 10 1/2 years between the two.) Little Guy was getting frustrated and feeling sad and I was just waiting for him to lose his composure. He came close, then he thought of something. "I can't win, but I can make pizza!" My oldest lost his interest in cooking early, an Little Guy knows he doesn't know how to cook much more than Ramen or a bowl of cereal. He made himself feel better AND stood up for himself in one sentence - and my oldest was dumbfounded! LOL

I highly recommend these two books to anyone with infants through preschoolers - even up to kids in elementary school who are learning to read. The illustrations are hilarious. You can check out some preview pages of Cows Can't Jump and Cows Can't Quack by clicking on the links. The books are are easy to read and interesting - something you often don't find in easy-readers. And, as I started off saying, they're educational without being "teachy", if you know what I mean. I am especially impressed with how, just by reading these books, Little Guy has managed to figure out how to deal with blows to his self-esteem (and his cars', too!)

Cows Can't Jump comes in paperback or board book, and Cows Can't Quack is available in paperback.You can order these books at Jumping Cow Press HERE. Shipping is only $1.99 for ANY quantity order in the U.S.! You can also find these books online at Barnes & Noble and Amazon.com. You can also find Jumping Cow Press on Twitter and Facebook.

I'd like to thank Dave Reisman for sending me a copy of each book to review. My little guy absolutely loves them both and so do I! I can't help but wonder if there is anything else cows can't do...

Disclaimer: I received paperback copies of Cows Can't Jump and Cows Can't Quack, and a board book copy of Cows Can't Jump (all signed! YAY!) from Jumping Cow Press for the purpose of this review. I did not receive any other form of compensation. All opinions are my own.

Outings Can Be Scary When Potty Training! {Giveaway! (12/17) US}

Sponsored by Tomoson.com Little Guy has been learning how to use the potty since the beginning of summer. He's only had a handful of accidents at home since we just let him run around without pants on all day. When he began learning to use the potty, I bought one small package of Pull-Ups (I know... guilty) to use. Those Pull-Ups ran out about a month ago and, even though it's tempting, I will not buy any more. That means that I need to be prepared for accidents while we're away from home. I have a plastic bag with a clean pair of pants, underwear, socks, and shoes in it that I lug around wherever we go. I didn't need to use it until last week's trip to the grocery store.

It seems that my husband shared raisins with Little Guy the night before. Lots of raisins. (How many of you just thought, "Oh no!"?) So, yeah... Now, I should have known something was up when he complained that his tummy hurt as we were walking to the bus stop. He only complains about "owies" when he really has them. We were almost there, so I told him that I'd rub his tummy while we waited for the bus. He seemed fine by the time the bus arrived and I forgot all about his tummy ache.

Well, the inevitable happened -  halfway through shopping, I start to smell something. Little Guy was walking funny. And he was unusually quiet - not running around trying to toss everything he could get his hands on into the cart. I just knew... Our Kroger does not have public restrooms, so I had to find an employee to show us the way to the "secret" bathroom in the back. I went through THREE people who refused to let us use the restroom! I had to make my way to the customer service desk, stand in line, and ask the manager. He started to shake his head, too. I threatened to clean a poopy little boy right there at the desk if he didn't show us to the restroom. That got him moving!

We got to the bathroom just as Little Guy's plastic pants began to leak - JUST in time! I looked around for paper towels that I could wet to clean him up and there weren't any (aren't employees - especially those working around food, supposed to wash their hands?!) There was only half a roll of that one-ply, see-through toilet paper. I started to dig through my bag. Band-aids, no. Camera, no. Crayons, no. Extra hat.... um, no. Then I saw it - I swear it had a heavenly glow surrounding it!

A few days earlier, I received two sample packs of QwikShower disposable washcloths. I tossed one of them into the bag and gave the other to my oldest to try out. I had planned on checking them out when I had a little extra time. I forgot and I am so glad! After undressing my poor little one, I opened up the package. I was expecting that fake lemony smell that wet wipes tend to have, but was surprised that it smelled really good! The wipe was about 10" X 12" and was thick enough that I knew it wasn't going to bleed through as I cleaned him up. I didn't think that just one was going to do the job very well, but it did. By the time we left the bathroom, Little Guy was clean and smelling fresh! (I let hubby deal with the laundry part after we got home!)

I plan on ordering a few more (you can get 10 for only $7) to carry around with us. After that experience, I don't want that feeling of dread at not having anything to clean him up with again! Plus, the scent is one that I know will appeal to my oldest. They'll be nice for him to toss into his bag for track or to use on those rare mornings when he wakes up just in time to get dressed and catch the bus. No one wants a nickname like "Stinky Kid" in high school!

You can buy your own QwikShower wipes at their online store - they will even send you a single-wipe sample for just $1 so you can try it out to see if you like it before buying more. QwikShower also has fundraising and affiliate programs, where they partner with PTA's, athletic booster clubs, and even bloggers. The organization (or blogger) will receive 10% of all proceeds from sales. You can learn more HERE, or contact Harvey via email.

Would you like a chance to win a 6-pack of QwikShower wipes to try out for yourself? Enter in the Rafflecopter form below!

Don't Have Time to Bake? {Smiley Cookie Review & 20% OFF!}

Now, I want you to know that I don't just grab up any review opportunity that comes along. Before I decided to do this review, I headed over to the Smiley Cookie site to check them out. What I found was surprising to me! The first thing I do when I contemplate buying a food item - online or in store - is check the ingredients. If I can read the listed ingredients without having to remember high school chemistry terms, I already feel good about the product. Smiley Cookies have ingredients that I can say without sounding-out the word. Yay! And, while some of the ingredients may not be the kind that we eat everyday, I see absolutely no reason to keep my family from indulging from time to time. This list of ingredients (wheat flour!) is tame enough that I wouldn't consider these cookies to be "indulgent" for my group of guys.

So, I decided to do the review. I can't tell you how excited I was when the package came in the mail! I secretly opened it up to check out the cookies. I didn't want anyone to know I had them because I had plans for them! I have to tell you that the box they came in is great. It is sturdy and has little Smiley Cookies all over it (see the pic below). I am still trying to decide what to do with it - send my mom's Christmas gifts in it or use it for something around here... Anyway, after I got through admiring the box, I saw the cookies - THEY WERE HUGE! I was expecting some little cookies that would just whet my family's appetite for more. Nope!

Remember a couple of weeks ago when I posted pictures of our outing downtown to watch the parade and meet Santa? I decided that, when we got home, we'd warm up with our Christmas Cookie gift and some warm cider. I hid the box of cookies where I knew no one would find them: behind the flour (I'm the only one who cooks around here!) Before we left for the parade, I poured the cider into the crock pot, added the spices, and set it to "warm". We all got outside and I "forgot" something. I came back in, pulled the cookies from their hiding place, and set them on the kitchen table.

When we got home, we were pretty chilled. The smell of the cider was welcoming! When the kids got into the kitchen, they were so excited to see this mysterious box with lots of Smiley Cookies all over it sitting on the table. They took off their coats as fast as they could and headed into the living room (they did not like that I wanted pictures!)

We received Smiley Cookies' Holiday Cookie Gift ~ a dozen Christmas cookies — Six Smiling Christmas Trees and Six Gingerbread Smiles.





They couldn't open them fast enough! As soon as the box was opened, my husband walked in, asking what was going on - as if he didn't know! LOL They all dun in. Little Guy, who loves "took-tees", couldn't sit still.I had to remind them all to save me one of each so I could taste them for this review. I can say that, without a doubt, we all loved these cookies!

 I was expecting to get crunchy cookies - something I'm not too fond of. Boy, was I surprised to bite into a SOFT cookie, instead! The gingerbread were perfect. The spice was just right and the texture was amazing. There was just enough icing from the smiley face to add the perfect amount of sweetness. The Christmas trees were sugar cookies. Now, I am pretty darn picky about sugar cookies - I've been spoiled by my Granny T's recipe. These were sugar cookies that I would buy! They were really good. Soft, light, and the icing was the perfect compliment.

Apologizing to the smiling tree before he finishes him off.

The happiest guy in the world - fists full of cookies!

I am so happy I did this review. I have found a new "favorite" cookie for the kids (and hubby!) that has ingredients that I know.The next time I want to order a Gourmet Christmas Gift for someone, Smiley Cookies will be the first place I turn to!

Notice how Little Guy is keeping his eye on how many cookies are left? LOL!

If you'd like to receive 20% any of Smiley Cookies' Holiday Gifts or Baskets, head over to their Facebook page and "Like" them. You will automatically receive a coupon code!


I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.

Positively Negative... Until Now. {Mindful Parenting Collaboration}

If you’re reading this, you might have the feeling that you want to change some of your parenting practices or, perhaps, you're curious about “mindful parenting” and what it could be. Well, congratulations for taking a moment from your day to click on the link. Erin of it’s OK and I are going to be working together over the next 40 weeks (!) on a journey toward more mindful parenting and would love to have you join us. To learn how we envision The Mindful Parenting Collaboration working, please read the introductory post HERE.

Remember when I vowed to make sure I posted on this every Friday? Well, I didn’t plan on Thanksgiving to give me such a feeling of blah. I just didn’t have the motivation to write. I’ve posted some giveaways and a couple of other things, but it’s not like I was writing something spectacular, you know?

And other thing: I’ve really been procrastinating on this particular post. As I wrote in the intro post to the third topic, Being Positive, I gave a ton of reasons that explain why it is important to be a positive parent. I believe them all to be true. I don’t think that the occasional negative attitude will screw up my kids’ well-being for life. But, looking up, rather than down, most of the time is best. That said, I must confess that I have a very hard time being positive. I haven’t always been this way. The more I saw promises go unfulfilled, the more lies I was told, the more I built something up only to watch it crumble before my eyes… Well, it hurt more each time it happened.

Even the little things started to get to me. Things like planning a family picnic. I’d tell my husband that I’d like to go on a picnic next Saturday. Throughout the week, I’d remind him. We’d talk about bringing some games, should we pack a meal or bring a bunch of sacks, would we bring a blanket to sit on or can we sit at picnic tables, etc. Toward the end of the week, I’d start mentioning that I’d like to leave at a certain time. On the day of the picnic, hubby would inevitably wake up with a headache or some other ailment. So, staying positive, I’d try to get things together by myself: make and pack food, get all of the kids’ supplies together, get the kids dressed, get myself ready… All while trying to keep an eye on a very wily toddler! The entire time, I’d be positive, “Oh, this extra rest will help him feel better!” Thirty minutes before it was time to leave, I’d go see how hubby was feeling. He’d get up and ever-so-slowly start to get ready. An hour later, he’d still be screwing around, doing a million things that he doesn’t need to do that suddenly become important NOW. The kids would start to get restless, fight with each other, get hungry… I’d finally just tell hubby he could stay home. He’d act disappointed, but agree that I should just take the kids by myself… again. The whole picnic would end up being a disaster. I’d be grouchy from the entire thing with my husband. The kids would still be tired and hungry. Little Guy would hit “I can’t hear a word you say to me” mode. I’d end up yelling, we’d leave the park much sooner that expected, I’d get home and just be so disappointed in everything.

So, I taught myself to think of all of the bad things that could happen. I’d make myself believe that they’d all occur. I figured that, that way, when something went right, it’s be a bonus! Suddenly, I was thinking negatively about everything. I became a helicopter mama – Little Guy could fall off the playground steps and crack his head open. Someone might see my oldest walking to his friend’s house and kidnap him. Every little thing had me freaking out. It wasn’t fun.

My oldest snapped me out of it. One day he had been invited to go with a friend to one of those splash mountain water park places. He came home, excited, and told me all about it and how much fun he’d have. Then he started adding little things like, “I hope their car doesn’t break down this week so we can’t go.” And, “I wonder if their floors are slippery? I don’t want to fall and get hurt.” There were more of these comments until he had talked himself into believing that something was going to happen between now and the date of the trip that would prevent it from happening. He comforted himself from the disappointment by deciding that it would probably be better if he didn’t go because it could end up being dangerous both driving there and at the water park. Isn’t it interesting how our children show us the real reflection in the mirror?

I knew I had to stop the negativity. I knew, but it was hard to do. I can’t stop myself from feeling crushed when my hope is trampled. I still haven’ figured out how to do this. I have learned to not be expectant of anything – in either a positive or a negative way. When I plan a picnic, I just plan. I don’t expect it to be good or bad, I just expect that we’ll have a picnic. It’s not as fun as getting excited about it and anticipating the joy we’ll have together. I’d love to be positive all of the time – LOVE IT. However, I am not ready for it.

Right now, I think that passively planning for things is best for me. I know I can’t expect everything to go wrong all of the time. I also know that I cannot take the emotional roller coaster that excitement and disappointment will bring. I am working on being positive, though, in small steps. This holiday season, for instance, I have decided to try to be positive. I made an Advent calendar and included little activities to do for each of the 24 days. They are little holiday activities that run the gamut from easy, five-minute crafts to spending a few hours at a museum. Rather than thinking of all that could go wrong or thinking of nothing at all while I plan, I am going to try to let myself get excited about our daily activities. I think that the trick, for me, is to not put any real expectations into the excitement. In other words, I will try my best not to envision us, as a family, walking hand-in-hand through the museum – with the kids cooperating with each other, Little Guy following all of the rules without my having to remind him, Hubby chatting away at me and happy to be there… Nope, I’m just going to be excited to get out of the house to go look at the decorated Christmas trees on display there.

Hopefully, by being a little positive in each of our daily activities, I will form a habit of thinking positive when it comes to other things.
Click HERE to add this linky to your own post!

The We Do Listen Foundation {#Giveaway (12/5) US & Can}

I've wanted to write up this post for over a week, but just couldn't find the time. Yeah, I could have done a quickie post... But I think The We Do Listen Foundation deserves more than that. This non-profit's mission is to help children learn to communicate their emotions effectively and find their own inner peace (how cool is that?!)

So, how do they do this? Check out the We Do Listen Foundation Web site. There, you will find FREE animated books, songs, posters and non-violent games. Additionally, the foundation sells nine Howard B. Wigglebottom books. The books are pretty darn great! Each one is focused on a subject that is important to children's personal growth, self-love, and general emotional well-being. Some of the topics covered in the books include: listening to what others have to say, bullying, anger management, divorce, peer pressure, and the need to belong. I received a book on the last subject for this review, and I love it!

My oldest was always pretty happy with himself. That is, until he decided to go to "real" school. The first month was pretty hard for him. His dad had cancer and was pretty sick at the time, so I attributed his quiet, withdrawn behavior to that. Then, I received a call from his teacher. It seems that he had started to make up unbelievable stories about himself - things he had done, toys he owned, people he knew, etc. - and the other kids knew that he was lying, the stories were just too amazing to be true. He wanted them to like him and thought this was the way to do it. After a long talk about listening to his own heart and being himself, then reassuring him that he would find friends who liked him just for who he really was, he managed to get past this huge speed bump. Within another month, he was one of the most popular kids in the class due to his empathetic nature (oh, and he was "totally cool" because he could draw neat pictures, too! LOL)

I really believe that the Howard B. Wigglebottom books, games, songs, and lesson plans would have prepared my oldest for his first taste of "I'm better than you because I _(fill in the blank)_" that seems to run rampant in classrooms.  In the book Howard B. Wigglebottom Listens to His Heart, written by Howard Binkow and illustrated by Susan F, Cornelison, Howard (a cute bunny who has the same feelings and makes the same mistakes that most children do) wants desperately to fit in. When his classmates laugh at him when they see him doing his very favorite thing, he vows to never do it again. Instead, he tries doing all sorts of other things that he thinks will make the other kids view him as being "cool".He screws them all up... miserably. He has a talk with his grandfather about the troubles he's having and, without telling him what to do, Grandpa steers Howard in the right direction. In the end, Howard is once again caught doing his favorite thing but, this time, he is cheered for it!

I am so glad to have this book for Little Guy. He's pretty self-confident right now, but you just never know when that confidence will crumble. It happened to my oldest! I've also been taking Little Guy to the Foundation's Web site to watch the animated versions of all of the Howard B. Wigglebottom books, play games, and learn new (catchy) songs. I've also taken some time to read over the lesson plans. There are some really great ideas in them! I think that, at three years old, it's the perfect time to introduce him to these concepts. Although I don't intend for Little Guy to go to school (he's 100% the unschooling type!), he'll still be around other children and need to be prepared for the inevitable.

I strongly urge you to go check out The We Do Listen Foundation's Web site and then head over to their online store. Right now, for U.S. buyers, all hardcover books are on sale for only $6 each (regularly $15)! And you can buy all 10 books for just $50. In addition to the Foundation's online store, you can find Howard B. Wigglebottom books nearly anywhere books are sold throughout the U.S. and Canada.

So, would you like to WIN your choice of a Howard B. Wigglebottom hardcover book for a special child in your life? Just enter in the Rafflecopter form below!

Late Post with a Thanksgiving Craft

OK, I'm so sorry that I'm posting this now. The last few days have been nuts. While I was busy with prepping for Thanksgiving Dinner yesterday, I needed something that was very simple for Little Guy to do on his own. Now, I have a TON of cool Thanksgiving projects lined up for him that I've seen featured in posts by some of my favorite crafty bloggers but they all needed me to help either by cutting or controlling the flow of glue. So, I just did the old turkey handprint thing. Then, we used some Sweet Gum leaves that we found and has pressed in a book a few weeks ago to create a frame. Finally, we added a few beads to say "2011".

1) Make hand prints with brown watercolors.

2) Outline "turkeys" with a black waterproof marker.

 3) Let your little one go nuts with watercolors! I used black paint to give each turkey an eye, red for their waddles and combs, and yellow for the beaks and feet. I got a solid 1/2 hour of kitchen time (alone!) while Little Guy worked hard to paint all of his turkeys.

4) I helped "steer" the glue, then gave Little Guy a pile of leaves to put all around the painting. Then, I wrote "2011" with glue and he added the beads.

HAPPY (belated) THANKSGIVING!

Get a Melissa & Doug 25% Off Coupon When You Take the North "Poll"

I know that many of my readers prefer to give their children wooden toys and toys powered by their children's own imaginations. So, I'm going to assume that many of you will be checking out Melissa & Doug this holiday season. If so, here's a very fun and easy way to get a whopping 25% off your order!

Melissa & Doug want you to tell them which of their educational toys you think is the best! Just click on the image below to place your vote in the North "Poll!" You'll Get a Melissa & Doug 25% Off Coupon** to use at MelissaAndDoug.com just for voting!

Tantrums Are on the Rise (Again...)

I just read Mummy in Provence's post for Stream of Consciousness Sunday, titled: Toddler Tantrums.   about her 18-month-old daughter's tantrums. I started to write a reply, then realized it was so long that I may as well turn it into a post. This is in response to her question:

"Any tips on how to cope with these Toddler Tantrums?"

Here's my response:

Little Guy's tantrums have been steadily increasing since they started, when he was around 18 months old. Nowadays, a "good" day is when he only has three or four. There are days when he'll have four in an hour! I attribute them to his increasing independence. He gets frustrated when he can't do something (whether he's not allowed or incapable - it doesn't matter which.) I also noticed that growth spurts can lead to more tantrums, too. Between being hungrier and more tired, plus he's probably a little achy from growing pains, he gets extra-crabby.

Sometimes he will throw a tantrum because he cannot have something he wants, but knows that it is impossible for me to even give him. Yesterday, he wanted to watch Thomas and Friends... on TV, not the DVD's we have. Thomas was not on TV at that time, so I told him that we would have to watch a DVD if he wanted to see the show. This led to a ONE-HOUR TANTRUM - I kid you not. A couple of days ago, he wanted to go to the library at 10pm. He is well aware of the fact that the library is only open in the daytime, when it's light outside. It's as if he's asking for the impossible just so he can let loose with his emotions. It drives me nuts and I often find myself taking it personally. I need to walk out of the room, cover my ears, and count to 10, 50, even 100 just to keep my cool.

The good news is, the more he is able to effectively communicate with words, the shorter the regular tantrums have become. I started to ask him to talk to me from the time his vocabulary suddenly had a growth spurt, around 2 years old. My mantra has been "I can't understand you when you cry or whine. Please use words to tell me the problem." If he is too upset to talk and I've given him enough time to feel that he's shown me how displeased he is, I'll ask him questions using vocabulary that he needs. "Are you feeling sad because you can't do ___?" And: "You must be very frustrated that the puzzle piece won't fit there." When he can tell me what the problem is, at least he knows his feelings have been validated.

I also communicate my own emotions to him. "I am becoming very angry because you are just screaming and crying and won't come talk to me." It lets him know that I can feel the same emotions as he does. It also makes me feel better to let off that little bit of steam. Just saying that I'm angry/frustrated/sad aloud makes ME feel that MY emotions have been validated!

I don't give in. This sounds mean, doesn't it? The thing is, with Little Guy, I've learned that giving in once means he'll try the tactic 1,000 more times. What I do is offer alternatives. I don't just give him one thing: "The library's closed. We'll go to the park instead." I don't give him an infinite number of choices: "The library's closed. What else would you like to do?" I give him two options: "The library's closed. Would you like to go to the park, or go for a walk?" He's back in control of the situation, yet he's not completely overwhelmed with choices.

Recently, he's started having tantrums that seem pointless. Today he had one because one of his Hot Wheels ran into another one. HUH?! He's the one in charge of the damn cars, and now he's sad because he made one car be mean to another? I quickly learned that the cars have absolutely nothing to do with these outbursts. About 95% of the time, I can stop him in mid-scream by offering a hug. "Wow, you must feel very sad about your Mercury Coupe getting hit by the Viper! Why don't you take a break from your cars? I'll bet you'd feel better if we laid down on the bed together and I gave you a bunch of big hugs." Sometimes he falls asleep, ans sometimes he's back in action and feeling happy in a few minutes.

Sometimes, there's absolutely nothing I can do. He just gets himself so upset that anything I say or do just feeds the fire. That's when I feel some big mama anger bubbling up. I need to step out of the situation, and fast. I'll gently set him on the bed and let him scream, hit, kick, etc. I will tell him once or twice to let me know when he's done so we can talk or hug. Then, I have to mentally take myself out of the situation. I'll watch TV - any show! - with Closed Captioning on and really pay attention to it. Sometimes I head to Facebook or enter a couple of giveaways. Anything to keep my mind occupied. I'm always in the same room with him to make sure he stays safe and to be here for him when he's ready.

Finally, I don't hold a grudge or act superior. I'll never rub his nose in the fact that he did all of that screaming for nothing because he didn't get his way. I won't act angry with him after he's finished all the yelling. I never bring the subject up again, as in "Remember the last time you wanted to ___ and I said 'No'? You freaked out and cried and screamed." It just reminds him of a bad time he had and tells him that I might still be angry about it because I remember it. I'm working on getting my husband and oldest to avoid these things, too. When they do it to Little Guy, I can really see how badly he feels about himself. Who would want to make a little one feel sad and ashamed? Why would a parent ever want their child to feel as if they didn't love their son or daughter as much just because of an emotional outburst?

Now, I'm no expert on the subject of tantrums. My oldest had less than FIVE tantrums - ever. When people used to complain about their kids' tantrums, I'd be secretly rolling my eyes at them. Now that I'm in over my head with them, I understand. I also know that it's important to listen to other parents' solutions to the question of how to deal with them. I sometimes wonder if I'm raising a bratty little boy and it scares me that he could grow into a nasty adult. So, now it's MY turn to ask:

Do you have any tips on how to deal with tantrums?

I LOVE Folklore From Around the World {Story Harbour #Giveaway! (11/23) US}

Sponsored by Tomoson.com I love a good story. When I was very young, I remember coming across a copy of Grimm's Fairy Tales and found myself lost in another world. This was the unabridged version - with a lot of gory details and vocabulary that was beyond my scope of understanding. But what I understood held my mind captive! I could almost hear the characters' voices in my head as I read. Since then, I have always preferred the "real" story over the pared-down versions.

That's why I was excited to have the opportunity to review the Story Harbour: Vol. 1, performed by Zette Harbour. This CD contains 50 minutes of folklore about life from all over the world. The six stories are not only entertaining, they're also tales that describe basic human desires and the consequences and rewards of each.

Track 1: Anansi & Stories
Track 2: Master Of All Masters
Track 3: The Little Old Woman Who Lived In A Vinegar Bottle
Track 4: The Crane Wife
Track 5: The Sound Of The Money
Track 6: The Innkeeper's Clever Daughter

 I'm going to tell you something about me that I'm slightly embarrassed about: I am terrible at reading aloud. First, my eyes are much faster than my mouth and I'm slightly dyslexic - I end up scrambling up the words on the page and often need to start over. It drives the kids nuts! The other day, after my third screw-up, Little Guy closed the book and told me he's wait for Brubber to get home to read it. Yeah, it's that bad. And, even on a good day, I mess things up. I try to give the characters voices to make the stories more fun. Ha! Either I end up giving them all the same silly voice, or I get mixed up over which voice is whose and none of the characters ever has the same voice twice in a story. (Good thing there are lots of pictures so Little Guy doesn't get confused over who is talking!)

Zette Harbour isn't just good at telling stories, she's a brilliant performer who can paint a beautiful picture in your mind with only her spoken words. Her story-telling style grabs your attention from the first word and has you listening with rapt attention. She gives the perfect voices to her characters and even includes accents based on where in the world the story originated. She adds excitement to her stories by speeding up and slowing down her speech, her tones rise and fall with the emotions in the stories. I could listen to Story Harbour, Vol. 1 repeatedly through the day and not get tired of it - I'm serious!

Now, it all well and good that I like this CD, but what about the kids? They both love it as much as I do! My oldest has always been fond of folklore and was excited to hear it playing when he came home from school last week. He was being "cool" and nonchalant about it, though. Rather than dropping his bag and heading outside to "hang", he sat in the kitchen and listened until the CD was over.

And then there's Little Guy. He's just turned three and doesn't have a lot of patience for many things. The first time I played Story Harbour, I was doing it for myself for this review. He was busy playing with cars, puzzles and guys all at the same time. After the first story, Anansi & Stories, I realized that it had gotten quiet - no more cars smashing into one another, no frustrated whining about a puzzle piece not fitting right, and I hadn't been hit in the head with a flying elephant for some time. Nope - Little Guy was sitting on his little chair with his hands folded in his lap, intently listening to the stories! It was especially surprising because some of the vocabulary is beyond his understanding. I guess he was doing what I did with Grimm's - just doing his best to understand. We've been listening to one story a night before bed lately. As he's falling asleep, we talk about the story. I'm really liking this new ritual!

Would you like a chance to share this wonderful CD with a little one in your life? Heck, you don't need a child around to enjoy this CD - enter if you love a good story!

I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.

I Found a Way For Little Hands to Cut Paper Safely! {Slice Safety Cutter Review}

Little Guy wants so badly to help me whenever I have the scissors. I've tried many times to help him learn how to use them, but he just doesn't have the motor skills needed to use scissors yet. He ends up so frustrated and I feel badly for him. Most of our projects require some kind of cutting and, being such a self-reliant little one, it drives him nuts that he cannot do this part of his project on his own.

I found a great product that he can use, though! It is called the Slice Safety Cutter. It's basically a little plastic thingy with a tiny ceramic blade in it. You hold the cutter, blade side down, and pull it along the paper you want to cut. It easily slices through magazine pages, printer paper and newsprint. You can cut straight lines and even curves. I ran my finger over the ceramic blade numerous times and didn't get a scratch, so I knew he could use it without me breathing don his neck every second. While Little Guy still hasn't completely mastered using the Slice Safety Cutter, he is already proud of his ability to cut paper on his own. I gave him an old magazine to try it out on yesterday and he had a ball!

I swear he has more shirts!

Note to self: Wash his face first!

Slice Safety Cutter is great for couponers! I always hated having to take the entire insert apart to get to that one coupon in the middle of a page - now I don't have to. I can just use the cutter to get to it. And what about those projects where you need to cut a circle or heart out of the center of a piece of paper? I always end up either folding the paper or cutting jagged shapes. The Slice Safety cutter makes short work of this!

I was kind of worried that the cutter would get lost because it's so small. I stuck it in the jar that I keep me paper clips in so I could find it. Guess what: the next time I pulled it out, paper clips were stuck all over it. It's magnetized, so I can keep it on the fridge, out of the hands of a little one who tends to lose all of my little things in a flash.There is also a little hole in one end so you can attach it to your key chain.

Now, here's the important part: When you buy products from Slice, Inc., you are helping with Autism research. The company was created as a way to help the founder pay for his autistic son's treatments and therapy. A portion of the proceeds from every purchase is donated to help fund autism research so that we may one day find the exact cause and even a cure for autism!

You can find the Slice Safety Cutter and many more innovative cutting tools for home and office at Slice, Inc.'s Web site. You can also connect with them on Facebook.

I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.